A Beautiful Train Wreck: A Review of 47 Ronin (Major Spoilers)

Lovers of Japanese culture are most likely familiar with the tale of the 47 Ronin, a group of samurai whose master was betrayed and killed by a fellow lord and who took revenge on their master's betrayer, after which they committed ritual suicide (I did say spoiler in the title). The term "ronin" translates as masterless samurai, which is what these men became when their master was forced to kill himself. While based on true events, it is a distinctly Japanese story in terms of the values it promotes; in particular the notion of redeeming one's honor by killing oneself is not exactly a widely-accepted one outside of Japan, especially not in countries practicing Abrahamic religions.

One wonders therefore, how it came to pass that Universal Pictures handed $175 million to first-time feature film director Carl Rinsch in order to come up with a movie about a story that is most likely to appeal almost exclusively to Japanese people, or people familiar with and/or fond of their culture.

To sell the movie, compromises were made. The dialogue was purely in English, with not a single Japanese word that wasn't a proper noun or the words "samurai," "ronin," "seppuku" or "bushido" ever being uttered by any of the cast, which consisted almost entirely of Japanese actors. Hollywood star Keanu Reeves was basically shoehorned into the story as Kai, a half-British, half-Japanese orphan crammed into the script, along with some magical mumbo-jumbo written in order to justify the extensive (and admittedly impressive) use of computer-generated imagery and to give the film's marketing crew the opportunity to liken their product to the Lord of the Rings movies.

Unfortunately the film still turned out to be a disaster of epic proportions, both creatively and commercially. At last count, the film has earned less than $90 million against its gargantuan production budget, which doesn't even include marketing costs (though in truth it felt like Universal didn't really go all out on that).

The first ten minutes or so of the film are devoted to introducing Reeves' Kai and the romance he develops with Mika (Ko Shibasaki), the daughter of Asano, the noble who adopted him (Min Tanaka). Thereafter, the betrayal and revenge plot begins in earnest.  Asano is tricked by rival noble Kira (Tadanobu Asano) into attacking him with the help of the conjuring of a witch (Rinko Kikuchi), who made Asano see things that weren't really there. Asano is disgraced by the attack and must therefore take his own life through seppuku, as decreed by the shogun himself (Cary Hiroyuki Tagawa), who, upon this gruesome act, declares all of Asano's samurai to be ronin and forbids them from taking vengeance upon Kira, whom he also instantly betrothes to Mika. Kira exiles the samurai and Kai (who is not one of them). It is at this point that the dubious distinction of being the film's lead character shifts from Kai to the fallen noble's right hand, Oishi (played by Hiroyuki Sanada, Japanese superstar and veteran of several Hollywood productions), as he plans his revenge upon Kira. He recruits Kai, whose earlier report that a witch was among them he had ignored, and together they recruit the ronin for a bloody quest that can only end in death.

The film is not a complete loss; the sets and costumes are a visual feast, the Hungarian countryside which doubles for 18th century Japan is gorgeous, and the CGI absolutely looks like the kind one would find in a movie with a budget flirting with $200 million. Unfortunately, none of these can save the film from its excruciatingly awkward script and its one-dimensional characters. There was one aspect of the script that I partly appreciated: Oishi explains near the end that the ronin have to kill themselves even if they succeed in their gruesome venture in order for the cycle of violence to end with them. I credit the screenwriter with trying to explain something as difficult to fathom as seppuku to uninitiated gaijin like myself, but even I know there's more to the whole process than that, and that it's largely a cultural thing which I certainly would not learn to appreciate just by watching a throwaway two-hour movie.

Also, I really have to credit the filmmakers with casting Japanese actors in ALL the Japanese roles. There is nary a Korean, Chinese or Taiwanese actor to be seen anywhere, and I couldn't help but think that the only reason Reeves (along with his goofy love story) was even in the movie was so that the suits at the studio would sign off on the budget. This is not to say the film would have been that much better without Reeves, though; it's still a grand old mess.

A fascinating thing, this film. It really is a creative train wreck, but one that comes in stunningly beautiful packaging. I had no plans of seeing it, but part of me is glad that I did.

Bottom line: Anyone who wants to see Keanu Reeves in a good martial arts movie should probably just pop The Matrix into their DVD player, while anyone who wants to see a good movie with the word Ronin in the title is better off renting the 1998 John Frankenheimer spy movie (which, to go off-tangent, made cars by Audi look cool way before Iron Man ever did). Anyone wanting to see better movie about Japanese culture, meanwhile, is better off renting anything by Akira Kurosawa or even Hayao Miyazaki.

2/5